And now I know I want to kill you like only a best friend could.

I'm trying to make myself like mad at Alex so I can forget about him.

I keep playing through little scenarios of how we could get back together. Like it's all I do. And I've noticed one reoccuring theme. Every single one starts with me being skinny.

So I can't be happy with someone else until I'm happy with myself? It makes sense, the other day when we were skyping Alex said he broke up with me because of my insecureities.

But being skinny is something I can do. I just need some self control, which I'm severely lacking in. Soooooo just get some self control Haley!

Anyways, I've done really bad the past 2 days. I went to the gym after my last post and I did burn 1000 calories. I was so proud of myself. But then I went to Applebee's for half price apps. And then I got sick and just ate whatever yesterday. And then this morning I just ate 2 bosco sticks and a poptart. But now I'm starting to feel not sick. And that's only 700 calories. If I don't eat anymore and go to the gym today could be like not bad. But idk if I can make it to the gym. It's such a long walk and it's sooooooo cold. And I still don't feel good.




Being skinny is the most important thing there is