Friday, September 30, 2011

My brain will not stop!!!

Kay I'm not 164, but there's like ten trillion things on my mind right now! I PROMISE I will start the 1 pound a post thing like immediately after this! Kay things on my mind.

1. Alex (exxxx) has been on my effing mind all night. Idk why. I just randomly miss him sometimes. And I should be over him by now, it's been like 8 months since we broke up. I'm making progress though...I've realized that I am way out of his league and he totally messed with my head/had the biggest ego in the world so I never really saw that before. But still....

2. I got the job at BDUBS!!!

3. And that is partly because of my love for sports!!! Deeeetroit Tigers playing some October ball!!

4. I'm going camping/partying this weekend with my friend from school. It started as a giant camping trip and it morphed into a giant party that people are camping at...whatevsss that's cool with me. I'm ready to get fuckeddd up. And see some dudes. I've officially decided that I'm done with hookups and that I want a relationship...but maybe this weekend can be like an exemption. I'm in serious need of some attention from some hot guys :)

5. Which reminds me of this guy...I don't even know what to say about him. Seriously, I don't. Let me get back to you guys on that. But honestly, I've never been so confused by a guy in my life.

6. I loved all the comments on my VLOGGGGG!! You girls are seriously too nice!! Thanks for the advice on the interview, I'd say it was pretty good, considering I got the job lol. And I live in Missouri, if that explains my accent or whatever you wondering about lol. Seriously making a vlog was so much fun. Maybe I'll do that for every 5 pounds that I lose....hmmm

7. I'm thinking about starting ABC on monday, and would like to do it with someone. If you are interested in that, let me know!!!

Okay, thanks for letting me get that all out! Maybe I can get some sleep now.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

I was bored so I made a VLOG!!

hahaha seriously, sorry it's so sucky....but it was kinda fun :)

Idk why the sound is so messed up.

Next time I make a vlog, I'll actually think about what I'm gonna say before I start it lol.

Oh and one thing I forgot to mention--lately I'm not able to comment on other blogs using like my google accounts thing...and idk why! I've just been commenting with the name "Haley" without it being linked to like this account. So if you see that, that's what's up!


I've decided that I'm only going to post everytime I lose a pound from here on out, so I'm 165 this morning (and I'm super embarrassed to be telling you all that, how did I GAIN that much weight!?) and next time I post I'll be 164. Hopefully that will result in some more motivating and quality posts.

Also, I thought I'd share my morning's thinspo. I saw this girl on the American Eagle website and I think she's devestatingly beautiful. I'd kill to look like her.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

"Live the Life You'd Be Envious of if You Saw Someone Else Living It"

SO I was reading through the October issue of Cosmo (fine literature) when I came across an article by Olivia Munn, and it's pretty good. I'm not sure if I took away from it exactly what she meant, but here's what I got...actually here' my favorite paragraph.

"Live the life you'd be envious of if you saw someone else living it. This is my personal mantra. Whenever I'm going through a difficult time, like a breakup, and I'm wishing to be the person who could get over it and move on, I tell myself to be that person. Instead of waiting to be inspired by someone else and being jealous that they're living a life I wish I had, I tell myself not to wait for that moment and to start being the person I want to be. If you wish you were the woman who went for that big promotion, learned a second language, dumped that guy who cheated on you, then just be that person. Think, if I have the energy to wish for it, I have the energy to do it."

She's really not saying to be someone else, someone you're not. I want to be the girl who works hard for her hot ass body. Emphasis on the hot ass. I want to be the girl who never leaves the house looking like a mess. I want to be the girl who works hard and plays hard. But always keeping it classy. But still down to earth. I want to remember that I am not entitled to anything, without working for it. I want to be the girl who can always be there for her friends. I want to be the chill, confident girl I used to be. I want to find satisfaction in being, rather than seeming. And I've never seen a person want to be all of those things as much as I do, so still 100% me.

So what do you all want to be? Make your lives exactly how you wish they were, and now! There's no better time than the present :)

Monday, September 26, 2011


and I also will keep the eating to a minimum.

That is all.

ps. I need some major motivation. If you're reading this, please send some my way!

Saturday, September 24, 2011


So today I ate really well and went to the gym for the first time in like a month. I'm sooo out of shape.

Then I binged on cookie dough and pasta lateee at night. I wasn't even hungry. I didn't even want to eat...I was just lonely.

My fridays used to be filled with invites to whatever parties, going out to dinner, getting ready with all my friends at the house, and then party hopping all night.

I literally have not spoken to anyone outside of my family all day today. And that just got to me tonight.

I'll do better tomorrow. I will get through this.

Friday, September 23, 2011

Sometimes, people suck.

Not going back to school this semester was a terrible, terrible decision. I heard people (mainly, my mom) saying that I didn't adjust well to college and I wasn't ready to go back/ couldn't handle it, and I believed them. I will never let that happen again.

I haven't been posting on here as often as I'd like, and I haven't been losing weight as often as I'd like. I've actually gained weight (shocking...not).

There's been a lot going on in my life and I just don't have the energy/time to write it all down and there's no way anyone would want to hear it anyway. There is one thing I need to get out there though, so if you feel like it, keep reading lol

So, I've been going out to my old school about every other weekend lately and I was there this past weekend. It's kinda awkward being back with at my sorority, which is a whole other story, but basically I just feel out of place. So last weekend I'm out at a party with some sisters/friends and I'm just really not having the best night. It was a huge dance party and I wasn't really in the mood and things just weren't going like I had hoped. So I decide to leave around 1am, which is extremely early for me. I'm on my way home when Alex texts me. If you know who I'm talking about, I'm so so so sorry for bringing him up again, and if you don't know who I'm talking about, he's my ex. Everytime I've been back at my school this year, I've been able to avoid/ignore him. I'm past all of that drama. I hardly ever think of him. But when I'm having a bad night and feeling out of place and he texts me, it just seemed like a good idea to hang out with him. So I went over to lambda chi, we start talking, and almost immediately he moves it to the bed. Not for like sex though, we're just cuddling and talking. And we talked for like 3 hours, then I sobered up and left after he fell asleep. That's all that happened.

I thought I was over him, but I'm not. But I don't think I want to be with him. I'd rather be with someone else. But that little incedent made me realize-- whenever I'm with him, I'm happy. Seriously everytime I've ever been around him, he's put me in a good mood. Idk why, I just know that's true. And that's why I hung out with him that night, I needed an upper. So idk what this means. He truly makes me happy, we can talk for me out!!!

So that's my guy drama (well, one guy lol) if you read all that, thanks. I'm getting new internet soon so hopefully I'll be able to upload pictures again shortly ( my internet sucksssss) Hopefully soon I'll be able to tell you all some new (good news) about my effing weight. ahhheiga;lkj;lkgjekgh

Monday, September 12, 2011

Wake up call!!

So there's this guy. He's in the fraternity that I'm pretty sure always gets the lowest gpa. They pride themselves in throwing crazy parties and being fratty. And he's like the voice of all that. And he's a DJ at an effing strip club! He always says he's on a 6 year track to graduation.

He goes up to my best friend, and asks her why she hangs out with me

She goes, she's a great friend and a freaking good time.

He says, "She's way too much of a good time. I can't handle it."

WTF!! Seriously??? Too much of a good time? I mean, yeah, I probably am too crazy for the president of the Christian Campus Fellowship or some shit like that...but this kid!!???

And I know there's truth to that. I get crazy all the time. I'm not even in school this semester. I take absolutely nothing seriously, other than my friends.

Okay, I need to grow up. I need to do something with my life. I need to start respecting myself. But come on, this kid is not the person to be talking shit on my lifestyle.

Saturday, September 10, 2011

What I hate about myself

- my fat bod
- my oily skin
- my dry hair
- my's not perfect
- neither is my stomach
- my legs are the fattest things in the world
- my yellow teeth
- my pale skin

This isn't as depressing as it looks. It's really a list of things I want (and plan) to improve in my self. Just getting it out there.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

When have I ever had a good 3 day weekend??

Seriously, I get so excited for 3 day weekends, and then they always end up sucking.

I think our lives can only handle 2 nights in a row of drinking drama.

Last friday I went down to my old school for the weekend. Most people were gone to the lake or just home so I didn't have to deal with too many people. Everyone was always at the same party though, no matter what house they were in. And uhh well, my perfect (totally kidding) reputation was ruined.

On Friday I hooked up with this KA I've hooked up with before. On saturday night me and Sig Nu got caught up in some EXCESSIVE PDA on the back steps at KA by a Beta Sig. That story went viral. Apparently it got sent out in a mass text to all of IFC (intrafraternity council)

And Sunday I got to deal with all of the repercussions.

I also broke my phone.

For the record: fraternities + pools = nothing good

I'm ready to be back there for school though. LOL.