I'm listening to lil wayne, in a laundry room, at 3:45 AM. I'm also eating a chocolate chip muffin and fritos. I totally fail at not eating. I feel it coming back though. That feeling where only being hungry can make you happy. All I want is to be skinny. Thennn maybe I'll be able to be totally confident and happy. Maybe.
Some updates:
1. The BF and I are officially facebook official. Crazy, right? It's more of a big deal than you think. I've never been in a facebook official relationship. This is a big step for me. He didn't even have to push it, just bring it up. "We've been dating for 3 weeks, I feel like it's maybe time for this to be facebook official." I thought about it for a second and realized that I'm completely comfortable calling him my boyfriend to anyone who asks, so why not put it on facebook so creepers will stop thinking I'm single? I'm really happy about this...really. I just don't want to admit it outloud or to my friends because I'm so scared he'll just break up with me soon. The first time I actually like a relationship the other person wouldn't...of course.
2. Midterm grades are officially up. They suck. I'm really worried. I did homework until 3:15. I'm planning the rest of my week around when I can study for my chem test on Friday.
3. Speaking of Friday, I'm so ready for the weekend. My bio class is already cancelled on Friday and I'm gonna do the best to get my math TA to cancel class too. If he won't I'll just skip and hope he doesn't drop me because he's already warned me about missing class too many times..... anyway I feel like I'm gonna spend practically all my free time from now until 8 AM Friday studying. So 9 AM-5 PM Friday are reserved for sleep. I expect to be showered and ready to go out by 7. I'll pre game at my boyfriends house and then hopefully party with my big sis. Our shenanigans are BAD ASS.
4. Continuing on the weekend, Friday will be a shit show for me because Saturday night is my sororities formal. I don't have a dress. I can't even where a dress. My arms and legs are too fat and that's like all you see when you wear a dress. Plus I'm breaking out on my shoulders really bad. I don't know why. Nobody else ever does. It's really not fair. Anyway, find a formal dress that covers your shoulders. I don't know what I'm gonna do about this situation at all. Obviously I need to find somebody fat enough to borrow a dress from and try to get away with wearing a jacket the entire time. EFFFF. And I don't know how excited my boyfrannnn is about this. He told me he was gonna pre-game with the 2 other guys from his house who are going when I told him there's absolutely no drinking before formal. I asked if I could join them.
Well my laundry needs to be switched and I need to go kidnap my big sis for breakfast. Starve yourself for me, won't you???
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