Wow. Apparently I was in serious need of some butt kicking.
Thank you, Jackie, for giving that to me. Thanks for the reality check and ideas and helping me realize that I AM better than this.
And mostly thank you for making me realize that Alex sucks.
Soooo glad I can say that.
Needless to say, I have some new found motivation and self respect and it's exactly what I've needed. I was able to go out last night and not get trashed. I still drank and got a little silly, but definitely not out of control. The craziest thing about last night? The guy I was hanging out with most of the time. He was a nice, innocent guy. He talked to me about school and how his house can help me anytime I need it. He bought me some drunk Huddle House at like 1 am. He taught me how the guys in his house climb onto the roof of my house. And we chilled on the roof and talked for a few hours. And when it was time for bed he walked me to my front door and gave me a hug. Interesting.
I'm obviously off track with food and not feeling the best about that but I will do better tomorrow, I promise.
Thanks to anyone who is reading this just for caring enough to read.