Wednesday, April 4, 2012

please please help me

I don't even know what to say

-I'm failing all of my classes
-I mean, I don't even do anything all day
-I'm sooooo unhappy
-Friday is the last day to withdraw from school
-My parents have no idea about any of this
-I don't hang out with anyone that I used to
-Alex and I have been off and on all semester
-I love him
-He loves me
-He can't deal with my insecurities
-I can't deal with my insecurities
-But still.......we can't not be in each others lives
-last night I told him I'm dropping out of school and probably won't see him on a regular basis ever again
-he told me to come over and we stayed up til 6am talking and watching movies and avoiding real life
-I'm soooooooooooo sad
-I have no idea what to do with my life
-I have no idea what I even want with my life
-I can't work up the courage to tell anyone this


  1. Sweetheart, you have to do what makes you happy. Don't try and live for everyone else. You are the one who has to deal with you, who you are, who you become and who you will be the rest of your life.

    The people who are meant to be in your life will love you and believe in you no matter what. The ones who dont, well.. you need to decide if they are suppose to be there.

    I love you, babe. Stay Strong

  2. I wish I could take even a little bit of your pain away. I'm sorry. It'll come, eventually.

  3. Hun, either you've not been here for a while or scumbag blogger doesn't tell me when you update.
    Gosh, you sound really torn. Beth is right, do what makes you happy. If dropping out of school and doing something else is what you want, then go for it. Besides, you can always go back to school if that doesn't work out.
    As for Alex, well, it's of my opinion that if you were right for each other then you'd work it out somehow. Maybe part of that is putting your insecurities away or hiding them from him sometimes.
    And please tell someone. It's like, that will help you clear your mind and work out what you want. Really, it does help. You're about to make a big decision. Don't do it while you are feeling like this.